On-line Dating Hack

This is 1 of the 2 photos used by some dude at OK Cupid.

As a comedian, one of the things you fear is another comic stealing your material. It’s happened a few times to me. Not a lot you can do except address it and then move on.  What I never imagined would happen is that someone would steal my identity for an online dating site. A Facebook friend, Michelle Jones, alerted me to this being the case on the OK Cupid website. This AJ Walker went as far as even using my old Myspace photo. (see below) How 2007 is this guy or what? Here is what this duplicitous maniac has offered up for a profile. In bold type is my breakdown of what the real Scott Long list would say.

An image of AJ_Walker28
—% Match —% Friend —% Enemy

AJ_Walker28

31 / M / Straight / Single

46/TG/Hetero-curious/Married (btw, appreciate you are selling me as a 31 yr old male, though.)

Marion, Indiana

Fishers, IN

His Details

Ethnicity
White Yes
Height
5′ 11″ (1.80m). I’m 6 ft, but close.
Body Type
Fit  Considering how much people lie on these, that is pretty accurate.
Smokes
Yes  Nope
Drinks
Rarely  Right
Drugs
Never  Rare to Medium Rare
Religion
Christianity  Wrong. Btw, thou shalt never lie–about your online status. Book of Jobs
Sign
Taurus  Aquarius
Education
Working on college/university  I think I graduated from University of Iowa.
Job
Computer / Hardware / Software  Nerds!!!
Income
$40,000–$50,000 Who am I to say?
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them  Has kids, but might not want them.
Pets
Dislikes dogs and dislikes cats  Half of that is right.
My self-summary

I am an average guy I guess. I have a good sense of humor. I design websites. I am a bit of a hopeless romantic. I’m a good cook imo. I love kids, just never found the right person to raise them with.
I am an above average guy who is very modest. I have a lot better sense of humor than some lying piece of shit who designs websites. I used to be romantic, now I’m just hopeless. I’m a good cook, ieo (in everyone’s opinion), I love kids, found the right person to raise them with, I’m just on here to meet new chicks to have no strings attached sex…wait a minute, didn’t mean to post my Ashley Madison profile.
I’m really good at

Being a friend…
Being an enemy of people who steal my essence.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food

I never liked LOST. Not surprised this person likes Undercover Boss, considering they use an Undercover Profile. Why do I see this guy on a Friday night eating Little Caesars while rocking out to REO Speedwagon?
On a typical Friday night I am

At home, because I have no life…lol
Yeah, it is laugh out loud. How about spending some time not hiding behind my face. (Not that I can totally blame you on that front.)
I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys  Can’t argue their, but also girls who like girls intrigue me, as well.
  • Ages 21–32  21-62 (I’m open to a wide demo.)
  • For new friends, short-term dating  I have enough friends, I’m in need of some lady to get down with by the middle of the first date.
You should message me if

You need someone to talk to that is only half as crazy as he looks. 😉
Now that part is pretty good. I might steal that one. 
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3 thoughts on “On-line Dating Hack

    1. I promise if this guy is getting laid by hot women using my face, I will resent it, since my face ain’t getting me any play.

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